In the spirit of self pity, here is my TOP 10 LIST of things I'm sick of at this point:
10. I'm sick of feeling sorry for myself!
9. I'm sick of talking about my back!
8. I'm sick of wondering if I've been misdiagnosed and trying to figure out what is really going on with my body.
7. I'm sick of waking up in pain.
6. I'm sick of wondering if my life will always be like this.
5. I'm sick of Ben Gay patches!
4. I'm sick of smelling like Ben Gay patches! (LOL)
3. I'm sick of worrying my daughter and husband who want me to get well so badly.
2. I'm sick of using my open lunch hours to rest so I can get through the rest of the day in pain.
1. I'm sick of sucking it up and smiling anyway.
Boy, I'm just a bowl full of cheeriness this morning, aren't I? I am just in no mood to mask my current state of annoyance with this situation. As the two year marker approaches, I'm simply angry that this is still on the radar for me.
I'll get back to my suck it up and optimistic self soon, but for now I'm letting myself feel what I feel - sad and angry. Forgive me for not being myself but please understand that pain can beat down who you are from time to time. It is in charge and I am at its mercy. That is what it feels like to live in pain.
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